It reminds me of a discussion with my sister in law about anti-LGTB rhetoric. She didn't like the fact that it should get someone (say an athlete or an actor) in trouble the way a racist talk would. (She doesn't know about my identity.) She described it as a reasonable religious belief that someone shouldn't be punished for expressing a differing opinion. It really had me miffed.
In hindsight, I think this is more about avoid applying the label of bigot to people one cares for, groups one's part of, or where one comes from. (Her family's church is kind of scary.) Some part of what those groups are is part of who you are, and no one wants to internalize that part of their background is bigotry. So I can understand why one would be resistant, even if those aren't their beliefs anymore. (I don't believe it is for my sister in law.)
